Breathing through the dark day

our ewwwww! shower complete with a tiny tub & two tiny kids. :)
I finally broke down & tried some...not that awesome...and I'm a kraut liker.
yes, that's kraut. welcome to poland!
Zora bean working on a puzzle in the English school area of our church building.
a self photograph by my main man, L.
Aunt Leane doing her helping thing.
my big fella & I in a hot air balloon! Lindsay, I thought of you!

Poland so far...has been an experience. I wish I could say it has been "lovely" and that all things have gone exceedingly well, but I cannot. That isn't to say that my babies have been sickly to the point of a hospital visit or that we've been lost or hungry...just lonely and very inconvienced.
For example...we've been stuck (smooshed) in our elevator shaft twice in the past two weeks...each time a rescue being 35-45 min. in the making. There is only standing room beside the jumbo stroller & each kid is in his/her seat as we sing & sweat & snack & hold our bladders 'til our rescue team arrives.
Then we have the *nasty* shared kitchen on our floor. I knew I wouldn't like it, but some days I really hate it. It gets smelly & gross & I seem to be the only person who cleans it or takes out the trash once a fortnight. ( I want to ask about it each time I go down past the reception desk, but no one but the manager speaks any English.)
Then there's the laundry, the lack of dryer, the icky shower, the lack of adult size tub (I squeeze my hiney into a large kid tub to shave), the general gray weather...cold, wet, & dark at 4 pm...*sigh.*
Add to this the sucky internet connection & the hours between all of us, as well as my hubby needing to work on the computer (which is a fact, not a complaint) & you get one sad mommy.
I think that if I had an outlet like in previous places (hooray for a great international community! three cheers for UF grad & family housing!), I would be less sad. I need moms & the kids need other kids. We've been searching a little & found a Helen Doran School of English close by, so we're going there twice a week & meeting other fams who speak ESL. I'm planning a lesson to teach the 8-10 year olds some conversational things. I hope to meet more friends this way, but it is seriously the only local outlet we've found. The few really nice some English speaking moms whom I've met have been in Kielce only for the day, so they would be "only weekend buddies," (when they happen to visit here) which wouldn't be bad, but it's nice to have a day-to-day mom-friend.
Poor Leanne! She's been my only girlfriend here so far! I'm sure she gets tired of my mom-ness sometimes, but she's been really understanding & we've had fun times. And poor Barclay. He is really trying to help keep us going, too, but this is tough. I feel slightly caged somehow. There are the million other things: Christine, how are you!? I feel like the worst friend ever bc I haven't gotten to call yet! Our computer has been out of commission & I haven't had a good opportunity to be the listener I want to be!
Mom, I'm sorry I didn't speak to you on your b'day! And my brain rattles on...Zora has had the worst diaper rash & so I've been trying to potty train her, but I think all the products here irritate her! I want to exercise so badly, but don't have my music to dance to & B doesn't want to download i-tunes here...(and somehow depression doesn't spawn a "get up & go attitude in me"...more of a "lay down & cry")...I'm doing some Yoga, though. Thank the Divine for Yoga, y'all. It's the only thing that reminds me to breathe sometimes. I know that is what I need more of. Breathe! Pray. Meditate on the Good Things. I'll make it through these next few months. I have a feeling Barclay and I will be closer because of it. I love him so much that I'm here after all! :)